13 March 2001
Last year: The whole thing had taken me about an hour and a half, including time spent leaning on the shovel and wheezing.
Yesterday, I gave someone the link to the site where I keep my writing. I went to the site, myself, just to make sure I'd given it to them correctly - it's been months since I made any changes. It even took me a little while to remember the URL. While I was there (and - to be honest - while I was avoiding work) I poked around a little. Read some of the stuff.
As I said, it's been a while. I was a little surprised by some of it. I'm thinking of trying to clean up a couple of the pieces and submit them to some 'zines. Anyone who wants to go look and send constructive criticism, the current candidate is "Bitter Fruit"
Yesterday got swallowed up by the Hall. I'm almost grateful that my new character is joining another character on a six-week journey. It's tiring, playing two characters at once. I hope by the time he comes back, things will have calmed down enough that I can just play them one at a time. I don't know how much hope I have for that, though.
Naturally, two days after spraying the garden plot with weedkiller, it rained all night. But thing had already begun to yellow, so I don't know if I'll need to reapply the weedkiller or not. I guess I'll take stock of the situation this weekend and see what's what. I'm beginning to think it might be easier for me just to re-dig the plot and hand-remove all the grass and weeds.
I've seen the beginnings of three hyacinth blossoms, though! Spring is sprung!
I remembered this morning that Matt's mom had mentioned, a while back, that she might try to come here for a visit this summer. I don't know if she's made any more plans than that yet, though I doubt it.
And we're trying to lure both Jeff and Karen to town for a visit this summer - preferably at the same time.
I guess that means I need to go up to the guest room sometime soon and actually put away the Christmas stuff that's been sitting on the bed since we took it all down.
Yeah, I'm pathetic. I know.
I think maybe this summer, if we can afford it after building the deck, I'd like to go on a real vacation - one that has nothing to do with visiting family. Don't get me wrong: I love my family, and I love Matt's family. It's just that visiting family has its own special stresses.
Naturally, I don't really know what I'd like to do instead. I enjoyed our brief trip up to D.C. last summer with Braz and Kris - maybe we could go up and visit Ashby for a few days. Or, since Karen said she didn't know if she'd be able to make the trip down this summer, and our finances permit, maybe we could fly up to New York. (Karen doesn't live in New York City, but not far from it, the same way Matt's family lives not far from Chicago or - for that matter - we live not far from Norfolk.)
You know, I hadn't really realized before how many people we know who live so close to big, interesting places. Washington, Chicago, New York, San Antonio... I even have family in Bangkok, though that trip is probably a little out of our reach. That's kindof cool. Is it because I live smack in the middle of a tourist area that I don't think about these things?
Occasionally, I'll be going about my boring, humdrum, day-to-day life, and I'll suddenly think: What if I were born somewhere else? What if I had been born in a third world country? Would I know any differently? What kind of coincidence is it that I am conscious, here and now? What is it that dictates that this consciousness be centered in this body?
The first time I got hit with this thought, I was about seven years old. I can remember the moment very clearly: I was sitting on my parents' bed, and the windows were open, a breeze blowing. And it hit me: What if I were born somewhere else? I wouldn't be sitting here now. I couldn't move for several minutes, overcome with the enormity of it, afraid that a wrong move would shatter everything, and I would wake up... elsewhere.
It is an awe-inspiring feeling, like glimpsing the face of God, or (the same thing in my mind) for one split instant comprehending the Equation that describes the universe, only to be left with the shreds and tatters of memory. It makes me feel insignificant - astonishing, how tiny the percentage is that I would ever even exist. And it makes me feel enormous - the universe, in all its grandeur, specifically created me.
Word of the Day:
sound (adj.) - free from injury, disease, or defect; firm or hard; showing good judgment
Currently Reading:
- Plan B by Sharon Lee and Steve Miller
Current Projects:
- real soon now