20 February 2002

Today's lesson, boys and girls, is: Liz Is A Dork.

Yes, indeed, I am veritably swimming in dorkitude. Let's take a look, shall we?

Part one: The Dorkitude of Cooking.

I'm not an enthusiastic cook, except for every so often when I am. I decided last week that this week's Wednesday get-together with K.T. and Kevin would consist of me making my new favorite lemon-garlic chicken for them. (Not forgetting the garlic this time, I hope.)

Somehow, on Monday, when I was at the grocery store, it wasn't enough to just buy the things I needed for the chicken dish. (Which was good, because the damn store was out of chicken breasts. What kind of stupid grocery store runs out of chicken breasts???)

No, I felt this deep and burning desire to get snooty about the whole thing, and I bought cheese and olives to serve on the side.

Well, that's fine, really. It's not like cheese and olives require a lot of preparation.

So then last night I was thinking about what dishes to serve things in, and I caught my eye drifting over toward the china hutch.

Yes. I am such a dork that for a perfectly normal dinner for three, I am actually thinking about breaking out the china and crystal and silver. And so far, I haven't been able to really convince myself to drop the idea, either. I keep having converations with myself that go like this:

"Take a deep breath. You can't put the china or the crystal or the silver in the dishwasher, which means you'd have to wash it all by hand. You don't want to do that, do you? No, I didn't think so. On the other hand, we haven't used it in over a year, since the Thanksgiving dinner we hosted, and it's meant to be used... Stop that! You don't have a tablecloth you can use for spring, or place mats. We do, actually, have place mats. They shrank funny in the wash, though. We could just put the plates on the bare table. What kind of heathen are you? Put china on a bare table? ..."

It doesn't end. That was just an example of what's flittering through right now. A little stream of consciousness for any James Joyce fans who stuck around even after I expressed my firm opinion that the man couldn't write himself out of a paper bag.

So after work today, I'm looking at going to the grocery store for chicken breasts - possibly several stores; I dunno - and then going home and prepping the dinner. And then I'll have to clean off the dining table, because it has once again become the repository of Shit Matt And I Don't Have Anywhere Else To Put. And then I'll call K.T. and Kevin to wake them up and put the dinner in the oven. And then... Then...

Then, boys and girls, we'll find out if the Dork Liz triumphs.

Part two: The Dorkitude of Gaming.

Okay, okay, I know I already have about a million Dork Points for being a gamer in the first place, and about a million more for gaming online, and then you can skip over any numbers that make sense and give me about a bajillion for having a freaking webpage dedicated to my characters.

But I was even more of a dork than that last night.

K.T. and Jeff were going to do a session for a plot they're doing. I asked to watch the session, 'cause I'm bored and I think the plot is kind of neat. They said they didn't mind, and then K.T. said in a private message that if I wanted, I could run the thief/mage they were going to encounter.

I was bored. I said yes. I asked her a few questions about how the thief/mage would handle certain situations, and what he'd say and what he'd do... And eventually I asked her, "So does he have a name? Or should I just change my nick to 'Mage'?"

And K.T. said, "Make something up."

I hate making up names for characters. I waffled for a while - which was fine, because K.T. and Jeff weren't going to encounter the mage for a while yet - and suddenly, it burst in on me like a fireball.

Fully-formed, like Aphrodite from the foam, he came to life in my head. I knew his name, his partner's name, how he operated, where all the traps were in the dilapidated building he worked out of, what he'd do if they tried to bargain, what he'd do if they tried to attack, where his partner was while all this was going on, what his escape route was, what his religious affiliation was, his history...

Everything. Damn it all, he's not an NPC any more, he's a freaking character.

I even - and this is my ultimate dorkitude for the day yesterday...

I even know how he ties in to one of my other characters. It's a fairly loose tie, at the moment, but it's there.

And for those of you on the Hall with me... No, it's not who you think it is, or the tie you think it is.

Oh, things are going to get very interesting pretty soon...

Yeah. I'm a dork.

--Liz