29 May 2002

I have a tiny rant to begin with.

I had written my congressman and senators a few weeks ago concerning a bill which would legally restrict the definition of the terms "marriage" and "spouse" to heterosexual couples. Never mind that it's not going to affect me, I know quite a few homosexual couples, and these people have commitments to their partners that are no less strong - and which deserve no less respect - than my commitment to Matt.

I'll go even further than that: As far as I'm concerned, "marriage" should be permitted to any group of people, of any size, who want to make that commitment to each other. Polygamy, polyandry, group marriages... It should be up to the desires and values of the people involved, not the government.

And so I wrote my representatives and asked them to consider voting against the bill.

One of them sent me a form letter. "Thank you for your input." Translation: "Are you nuts? This is Virginia; I don't dare vote against this thing. But we'll file you away as a statistic, just in case the population suddenly turns liberal. And the sky can turn orange, while we're at it."

Yesterday, I received a letter from Senator John Warner. It was probably written by an aide, but it was not a form letter. It addressed the specific points of my communication (including a correction to my original information, which listed the bill as a constitutional amendment).

It did not, however, attempt to either sway or appease me, as it rather self-righteously informed me that Senator Warner had voted for similar measures in the past, and would continue to vote for "traditional family values" in the future.

I wanted to spit. Traditional family values. It sounds good, but it doesn't mean anything.

Traditionally, wife-beating is acceptable. Traditionally, a man had the right to sell his children into slavery.

Traditionally, slavery is an acceptable institution, and traditionally, people with dark skin are inferiors and savages.

Just because something is traditional doesn't make it right. Just because you think something is icky doesn't make it wrong. Of course, when an accepted notion is recognized as inhumane and unacceptable, the traditional response is to fight against it.

And so I will be responding to Senator Warner in the time-honored and traditional way: I will find another candidate for whom to vote in the next election.

Matt and I have been waiting for what seems like forever for our tax refunds. Every day for weeks now, we've been saying to each other, "Surely it will arrive today." We have plans for that money, you see.

Yesterday we got mail from the IRS. With trembling fingers, I opened the envelope... It was not our tax refund.

We made a mistake (okay, okay, I made a mistake) filling out our deductions, and this was a mail informing me that it was being corrected.

Specifically, we are due back almost two-thirds more than what I'd originally calculated.

Matt and I just stared at each other for a while. Our refund was almost going to double.

Suddenly, the delay seems much more forgiveable.

(And suddenly, there is more planning to do.)

--Liz